*ahem.*

(summary of edited text: Now playing, pimpin' club songs - remember the poster, always remember the poster. Not playing, romantic things.)

I had a plan. This does not change the plan. In fact, it reinforces the plan. The plan will continue, and as it has been designed such that failure is nearly impossible, it will succeed. The plan will go forth, and I will be as happy as I was for the first few months of the first semester of my third year at Washington College. Before.

(summary of edited text: Anger, determination, and cursing. Something about going to the gym more and not being sick being nice concepts.)

Now playing: Manson, Rammstein, Slipknot, and other stuff I haven't heard in too long

(summary of edited text: this isn't about causing guilt in any particular reader, so I'm taking the personal stuff offline, to be discussed in the future if the situation arises; if I'm this over it by now, then I'll be fine by tomorrow, or definitely by a few days, at least until I decide to confront my source of conflict. "...but I am tired of dancing, and I am tired of bushes, and I am tired of parlay." And that's the honest truth.)

...a little late, but then I've always been a bit slow, especially when facing painful truths. And I just realized that this is not going to ever be posted. Not in the current form. Or at least not until I've decided on a better course of action than putting all my juvenile thoughts up on a weblog.

(summary of edited text: I've done enough damage to my emotions and psyche for one night, I'll give it a rest now before I realize how much of a dumbass I was and how much of a chance I missed.)

It really is a shame I can't post this whole, in some lights it would be really funny.


Now playing:

Rammstein, Du Riechst So Gut
Rammstein, Feuer Frei
Slipknot, Wait And Bleed
Disturbed, The Sickness

Mmmm, anger and angst. The truest emotions I've had since this time last year.